no sinking lures allowed

a few years back, right before i left home to come to BYU, i was talking at church with one of my seminary teachers who has inquired about my less than favorable dating circumstances. his advice was this:

well, there's a LOT of girls at BYU.. its time for you to go fishing!

...


huh.

just this month, while my roommate was on his flight from houston to provo, he sat by a man who also happened to be LDS. upon finding this out, the first thing this man asks my roommate was this:

so then, how's the wife hunt going?

...


huh.



now i don't know a whole lot about hunting or fishing, but i'm gonna spell out what i can figure anyways.

this may or may not be where my sources come from

i'll start with hunting:

from what i can understand, the hunter first must seclude himself within the bushes, trees, or otherwise natural things in the environment to avoid detection. the hunter wears camouflage to further his or her stealth. he then either waits for or runs after the prey. often, a hunter will wait by a river or stream, hoping to find an animal looking for a drink. the hunter then shoots and fatally wounds said animal. cool. great job, man.

the hunter takes the animal and gets it skinned to either sell the fur, keep it as a rug, or do whatever with it. he may take the meat for some tasty snacks later on. or he might just have some weirdo cut off the head so he can hand it on his wall. whatever he wants, really

and that is what i understand about hunting.


now on to fishing:

a fisher will put some bait on a hook and casts it out into the water. he waits for the fish to bite the bait, as fish are a little silly and don't usually notice the hook or understand that it's a threat. upon biting, the fisher then yanks the rod so that it pulls the hook through the fish's mouth, and reel the fish in. often, the fish is fighting for its dang life. once forced out of the water, the fish will pretty much suffocate and die. the fisher will then gut the fish, cut of its skin, and eat it, or have it plastered so he can hang it on his wall for all his smelly old man friends to see. that, or he'll make the fish sing cheesy songs to people who walk by. whatever he wants, really






now, thinking about what we do when hunting or fishing, it actually kind of scares me when we think about dating as "going fishing" or "hunting for the one." i mean, sometimes i feel like i have to trick a girl into spending time with me and then she's fighting me the whole time, trying to go back to her natural habitat.. but i don't really think that's how you develop a mutually dependent relationship. and i won't pretend like i know anything about dating.. but i don't think its really about stealth, deception, force, or fatal wounding.. nor do i think that the end goal is to eat the other person or show her off to all your friends.


and i get it- marriage is important. so important, in fact that its a covenant that we make with God in the temple. when you think about it that way, its kind of a big deal

unfortunately in our wonderful little happy valley i think we treat it way more like a social status or a really cool pokemon card (or whatever you kids are into these days). it's like we think more of people who are dating or married- they somehow have more value or they're more important.

i really blame our silly hunting/fishing mentality. we can all love the guy who shot the biggest dear or caught the heaviest fish.. but that aint really what it's about, now is it?

and i know that it's a metaphor. i just think its a really crappy one. hunting is all about what the HUNTER wants. fishing is all about what the FISHER wants. if dating was all about what the "HUNTER" wants then well.. that's just sad.



then again, what the heck do i know? probably nothing.. i don't have any dead fish or deer heads hanging on my wall  O.o